As my various endeavours begin to swallow me whole and my new naturopath determines that the theme of my current emotional state is ‘disconnect’, I return to words for their gravity. The bumper sticker in my head reads ‘I’d rather be blogging’.
It is pretty much just labour that is keeping me from this space. The labour of building this project, of working my way into some community (which is something I have to re-develop my skills for), of keeping the kitchen clean (because if that falls apart, then so do I). While I don’t really want to work 7 days a week, and I won’t when the initial setup of the biscuitry has rounded out, I do find a feeling of self-containment and self-satisfaction within my bubble of disconnect. I have taken some of the things I knew didn’t work for my in my last labour role and finding places to get them in my new ones. Collectivity and co-operation, non-hierarchy, intentionality about process, fluidity and experimentation. The opportunity to develop at a natural rate. I do not like being isolated from things like friends and free time and art and music and the outdoors. But if I’m going to be away from those things, this is an agreeable way to do it.
As far as the conditions and execution of one’s labour are concerned, though, this lady has it figured out.